Why dosen't it rain?

The rain makes all things beautiful.The grass & flowers 2.If rain makes all things beautiful why doesn't it rain on you?

Please help me!

im at the police station.The police caught me & filed a case against me "possession of good looks".i'm doomed! i need someone ugly 2 bail me out-so hurry up!

The Call -

A girl called me & said "Come no over, nobody is home". I went over. Nobody was home

The missing cat

This cat, is cat, a cat, good cat, way cat, to cat, keep cat, a cat, idiot cat, busy cat, for cat, 20 cat, seconds cat! Now read it all without the word cat!

The little thing

1 day there was tis naked man N elephant, da elephant looks at the naked man 4 a few seconds, then ask da naked man, 'HOW CAN U BREATH THRU THAT LITTLE THING?

No Santa! -

I can't hide this from u anymore i really don't wanna hurt u but i feel it's beter i tell u b4 u hear it from sum1 else im really sorry but there's no santa!

Read Backwords -

Piss the taking is someone that realise u this like times at its! NOW READ IT BACKWARDS!!